Medical Billing Supercomputer

We have finally found a supercomputer nearly capable of handling the hideous complexities of medical billing. Most modern computers can calculate the trajectory of every meteor in a storm of 6 million meteors, figure all the possible outcomes for each atom in a supernova, and process every ether-space phone bill in the entire universe, or even successfully file tax returns for politicians...yet the sheer mathematical paradoxes, intrinsic irrationalities, and dimensional warping involved in medical billing have up until now been too much for even the most muscular quantum supercomputers. True, if galacto-medicaid is involved, or if you try to invoke COBRA benefits, this machine will get bogged down and confused, and might start shooting jets of steam off in all directions, and continue mailing threatening bills with a zero balance to clients for the next 60 years. Nevertheless, the device performs functions that previously required 50,000 medical billing professionals.

See more photos of the supercomputer in action here.

Item #12b: We will bill you an usnpecified amount later, based on a ridiculously complex algorithm.