Shield System - Positron ray and Gravitron ray Resistant!

We have personally field tested this shield material (by personally, we mean our office intern, Justin, has personally tested it...) and we (Justin) found it to be totally resistant to positron beams, 80% resistant to stray gravitron radiation, and slightly impervious to random neutrinos, but that's pretty good considering neutrinos go through lead like it is wet tissue paper. Which is good, because if you get a bunch of anti-matter hurtling at you it makes a pretty big explosion if it touches any of the electrons involved in your ship's hull or, god forbid, your family jewels!

Clearance Sale! Dirt Cheap Accelerator Mechanism

Everything must go! Clearance sale! We are selling these accelerator pedals so cheap you won't believe it! Two for the price of one! We promise your craft will be much much faster once you install this component, so take your ride down to the racetrack and hold on tight!

Some people have been worrying about whether it is wise to have starship components so complex and involved and computerized that a stray speck of dust on the circuit board might make your cigarette lighter reach out and bite you on the derriere. I admit, I am the first to feel annoyed when I have to call a zit faced 15 year old to reprogram my window cranker circuit so I can roll the dod gam windows down. However, I don't think people should complain about going fast. Think about it: in a few highly publicized cases, a so called "defect" allowed a fairly wussy underpowered craft to achieve quite high velocities. They should be thankful!

Neutron Flushing Particle Beam Accelerator Turbine

These things break all the time, so you had best keep a few spares on board. Ours are more durable than the usual junk you get, and the neutrons you flush can help to clean out the minstrel's quarters too, all part of the drive for greater overall efficiency.

Quaint little Antique Radiofrequency Cavity

Those primitive piss-ants on Earth must think they are pretty hot. Check out this pathetic

piece of "high tech" gear they are so proud of. Made of copper! Ha! How basic can you get?

Nevertheless, we were proud to supply them this antique ornament for their navel-gazing exercises. We gave them a CRAZY bargain of only 46 billion earth dollars (32 galactic dinars). After all, nobody else in the galaxy would have any use for this dinosaur. No need to tell them about how the previous Klingon owners treated this equipment.