A sign of intelligence: Teleprompter Circuit

Although speaking with a teleprompter is considered by some a worse sin than rambling on like an absolute empty headed ninny, we feel it is a vital part of a starship's communications systems. Think about it: you are cruising in to the outer orbit of Penumbra Colony Number 12, when the dreaded customs officers call you up on the video conference screen. Which would you rather do, say the correct information relayed by your teleprompter, or wing it with some folksy nonsensical and grammatically challenged, off topic rant that betrays your complete lack of understanding of import tariffs in particular and basic civics in general? Go with the teleprompter. And this is the best teleprompter available, although it has the price of a rather substandard shoddy model. You know, some people say the ability to hold two apparently contradictory ideas in their mind simultaneously is a sign of deep intelligence. If you are unable to reconcile the simultaneous alleged superior quality and evident inferiority of this model, it is possible that your are stupid. Even stupider than someone who scorns teleprompters and profoundly misunderstands the meaning of the word "socialism".

Information distribution network and user Console

The efficient flow of information is vital, and absolutely central to the proper functioning of a vessel. If you are some elitist, spoiled, Richie-Rich type, you can have a screen or something as your interface, or even electrodes in your central nervous system to speed up the perception and incorporation of inputs and outputs. But for most people, a series of bells and whistles pretty much tells you all you need to know.

Overhand Wingnut Kerfleuffle Insert

This will align your kerfleuflle and integrate your wingnut platform.

Microwave death ray receiver / space pong paddle

We like to offer quality products that are versatile and have multiple uses. Take this long range microwave deathray broadcast receiver. There is no law that says you can't also use it as a paddle for heavy multi-player games of space pong. No law worth observing anyway. Ever since the galactic communications commission auctioned off the last remaining bandwidths in the ultra-shortwave-infrared harmonized spectrum, the communications band of choice among the wise is the death ray spectrum between 0.00012 quiggahertz and .00000000578 necrohertz. The GCC is offering coupons to help you purchase translator boxes so that you don't get vaporized while trying to watch your favorite CrabNebulan sitcom.

Item#sT00p1d : 3 GCC discount coupons.